How to say no

past weeks have been rough. i believe i haven’t been the best person. 

to be honest, I’m a little shaken. but after settling down a little and with an overseas trip in less than a week I’m optimistic things are about to become even better. 

but the one thing i’ve learnt about myself is that i have the ability to say ‘no’. 

yes. as selfish as i seemed to be sometimes, i am also a ‘doormat’ to many people. authorities at work, colleagues and even subordinates. i deserve more. 

but deserving more isn’t just saying but it is to justify it each time. we’ve been through rough patches but to learn how to fight for oneself that’s a new ball game. 

i’m super thankful for my bf, KM, who’s been standing by me for the past couple of weeks. even though i was really quite messed up. i begin to see my insecurities as an issue of the heart. something bruised so long ago, that i retreat from situations only having to accumulate it over time. 

im thankful for people who showed me the person i am and the person i can prevent myself from becoming each time. 

its a learning process. learning to say no can actually be one of my biggest challenges so far. 

so yes, after a double confirmation (one from my boss.. who said i need to be a lil more assertive) and another from Sheryl (my cgl) , i can only conclude that it’s true. 

one last thing: tact is one thing. but not saying something genuine to pretend to have ‘tact’ is another. 

strike a balance before it strikes you. 

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